The 1970s were a time of bold fashion statements, but not all of them were winners. This decade’s hairstyles often pushed the boundaries of style and taste, resulting in some truly unforgettable looks. From towering perms to gravity-defying bangs, these 25 hairstyles represent the worst of 1970s hair fashion. Let’s take a humorous look at these cringe-worthy coiffures and why they should stay firmly in the past.
1. The Towering Perm
This gravity-defying creation was all about volume, but perhaps too much so! The perm towered high above the head, creating a veritable hair skyscraper. One can only imagine the amount of hairspray needed to maintain this look. While it stood tall in the 70s, today it’s more likely to topple over in laughter.
2. Flequillo de plumas
Feathered bangs were all the rage, but they often looked more like a bird’s nest than a style statement. With layers upon layers, these bangs were meant to flow gently. However, they often ended up resembling a disheveled bird taking flight. Today, this style flutters more towards comedy than chicness.
3. The Shag
The shag was supposed to look effortlessly cool, but it often seemed more like a mullet gone wrong. With uneven layers and haphazard styling, the shag often appeared messy and unkempt. Despite its rockstar intentions, this hairstyle was more likely to leave you looking like a roadie rather than the lead act.
4. The Pageboy
Inspired by medieval knights, the pageboy was meant to be sleek. However, it frequently ended up looking more like a helmet. With its rounded shape and blunt edges, this style could make anyone appear as if they were ready for battle, but not with fashion. It’s a haircut that’s best left in the history books.
5. The Afro Gone Wild
While the afro is iconic, the 70s took it to extremes. At times, it seemed that bigger wasn’t just better, it was mandatory. Some afros reached wild proportions, making heads resemble oversized cotton balls. Though iconic, moderation might have been key to avoid looking like you’re wearing a fluffy hat.
6. Rat Tail
The rat tail was a curious choice, leaving a single strand long while the rest was cropped short. It looked as though someone had started a regular haircut but became distracted halfway through. Although meant to be edgy, it often appeared as though the wearer had forgotten to finish grooming. Some trends are best left behind.
7. The Mop Top
Inspired by the Beatles, the mop top was a youthful hairstyle. However, it sometimes resembled an actual mop more than a haircut. With its thick layers covering the ears and forehead, it often left the wearer looking like they’d just cleaned the floors with their head. A blast from the past best forgotten.
8. Poodle Perm
The poodle perm was tightly curled and unyielding, resembling, well, a poodle. This style was all about tight coils but often ended up looking less chic and more like a canine caricature. While perms have their place, the poodle perm might make one bark up the wrong style tree today.
9. Corte de cuenco
The infamous bowl cut looked exactly like it sounds. Typically achieved by placing a bowl on the head and cutting around it, it resulted in a uniform fringe that left little room for creativity. While practical, it’s a style that screams ‘kitchen experiment’ rather than fashion-forward haircut. A style to shelve permanently.
10. The Crimped Look
Crimping was meant to add texture, but it often ended up looking like the hair had been caught in a paper shredder. The zigzag waves were intended to be unique but often came across as frazzled. Though fun to attempt, crimping had a tendency to make hair look more chaotic than chic. A blast from the past!
11. The Ducktail
The ducktail, or ‘D.A.’, was slicked back to meet at the nape like a duck’s tail. It required copious amounts of gel to maintain, but often fell victim to gravity. While a daring choice, the ducktail could quickly devolve into a greasy mess, leaving you more flop than fab. It’s a style best left grounded.
12. The Mullet
Business in the front, party in the back: the mullet was truly a dichotomy. This style tried to balance professionalism with party vibes but often leaned more towards confusion. While it aimed for versatility, it usually resulted in a blending of looks that clashed more than they complemented. A hairstyle that should stay behind the curtains.
13. El Bouffant
The bouffant aimed for elegance but often veered into excess. Teased to towering heights, this style required substantial hairspray, resulting in a helmet-like appearance. Though initially glamorous, the bouffant often became a caricature of itself. It’s a hairstyle that looms large in memory but is better left out of modern hair choices.
14. The Mushroom
The mushroom cut was aptly named, often looking like a mushroom cap perched atop the head. With its rounded shape and flat top, it was one part whimsical, two parts peculiar. While it provided an easy maintenance option, style-wise, it leaned more towards fungi than fashionista. A haircut that’s best left in the compost!
15. El Flip
The flip featured ends that curved upwards, almost defiantly. This style was all about that flick, but it often ended up looking more like a style malfunction. While it aimed for sophistication, the flip frequently flopped, resulting in hair that appeared wind-blown and rebellious. A style that’s best kept in vintage albums.
16. The Beehive
The beehive was an architectural feat, towering above the head with layers upon layers of teased hair. Though intended to be elegant, it often looked more imposing than inviting. Maintaining this style was a challenge, and it frequently attracted unwanted attention from curious bees. A hairstyle that is best left buzzing in history.
17. The Pixie Cut
The pixie cut aimed for chic simplicity but sometimes ended up looking like a hasty trim. While it highlighted facial features, it could also resemble a lawn that needed watering. Though meant to be stylishly short, the pixie could come across as less fairy-tale and more like a haircut gone awry.
18. The Helmet Head
Helmet head was not so much a style as an accident of engineering. Teased and sprayed into a solid mass, it could withstand gale-force winds yet remain intact. This hairstyle prioritized resilience over aesthetics, leaving wearers looking like they’d misplaced their motorcycle helmet. A look that’s best left in the garage.
19. The Curtain Bangs
Curtain bangs were all about framing the face, but often ended up resembling actual curtains. Split down the middle, they aimed to be whimsical but could look more like a pair of drapes. While intending to add softness, they frequently resulted in obscured vision and awkward moments. A style to close the curtains on.
20. The Spiky Do
Spiky hair was a statement of rebellion but often looked like a porcupine had taken up residence. This style defied gravity, but the spikes were often more comical than cool. While aiming for edge, it had a tendency to look more like a cautionary tale in hair styling. A look to let down gently.
21. The Sideburns
Sideburns of epic proportions were a staple, often extending well below the ears. Though intended to convey rugged masculinity, they frequently appeared more like facial hair gone rogue. With sideburns this bold, the wearer often resembled a misplaced Victorian gentleman. A style that’s best trimmed back to reality.
22. The Faux Hawk
The faux hawk flirted with daring style but often fell flat. While it aimed to mimic the mohawk, it lacked the commitment, resulting in a look that was more confused than cool. With its half-hearted spikes, the faux hawk could leave the wearer more wannabe than warrior. A style to let fly away.
23. The Bouffant
The bouffant was all about height but often went too high. What started as a sophisticated style frequently transformed into a towering hair sculpture. Though meant to impress, it could leave the wearer looking more like a human topiary than a trendsetter. A style that’s best admired from afar.
24. The Sideshow Bob
Inspired by chaos, this style was a whirlwind of curls and frizz. While aiming for quirky charm, it often ended up looking more like a cartoon character’s bad hair day. With a mind of its own, this hairstyle was unpredictable and unruly, making it more of a sideshow than a main attraction.
25. The Wedge Cut
The wedge cut was angular and bold, but often bordered on the bizarre. With sharp lines and defined layers, it was less haircut and more geometry lesson. While meant to be daring, it sometimes appeared more like a structural engineering experiment. A cut that’s best left on the drawing board.